Your Friendly Neighborhood Starbucks is Closing

Well, for all of 3 1/2 hours, that is.

CEO Howard Schultz ( that names sounds oddly familiar, right? ) has announced new standards in the espresso biz. He plans on re-engineering the entire employee base, including laying off a chunk of the 135,000 + employees.

Starbucks officials said the hiatus is geared toward "energizing partners and transforming the customer experience ... to provide a renewed focus on espresso standards that will help ensure the exceptional quality of every beverage,"

What does Amber Linskey have to say? Fuck Yeah!

Though the majority of Starbucks customers are unaware of the differences between a simple latte and a cappaccino, many 1000's of well informed coffee drinkers were outraged when the international chain switched to the Super Automatic Espresso Machine ( or as the hip kids call it, The Automatica ).

In this fashion, anyone can be a Barista.
Ten minutes with this machine and you're pumping out espresso shots that are individually measured, tamped and poured for you.

Kinda cheapens the ambience, eh?

What do you expect, though? A Chain that inflates so quickly can hardly support itself as far product goes, how can we expect them to find the means to properly train their employees. Good training takes diligence, which takes time and Starbucks was unleashing sister stores across cities around the Globe.

With the recent decline in the economy, and the ever burdening recession that we all seem to sliding into, Starbucks has had to close 1000's of their national stores.

This provides them with the perfect opportunity to implement their barista re-training program. Meanwhile, Where the hell are you supposed to go between 5:30 and 9 am?